On this issue of ‘every idiot with a sword is killing each other for some reason’, the Vistula River and lower Delta is now effectively under a spontaneous blockade of piracy and riverside archery. The Kingdom of Peldor is basically broken, and while it spent a lot of time and resources building riverbank fortifications and outposts to protect river trade, those forts are now infested with God-knows-who.

Just the other day I took a barge up the Vistula and we were set upon by bandits three times. Young guys and girls, and I’m embarrassed to say I took a blade to the gut, but I beat the crap out of them and started shoving their dumb heads under the water to teach them a lesson. But some didn’t even speak Peldish!

I know that further along the Vistula the steppelanders took control of a wide swath of territory to break the link between the homeland and the north (coffee flow disrupted yet again). They’re an enemy nation trying to stop our conquests, so fair enough, but I can’t fathom what’s gotten in everyone’s heads for them to murder their fellow elves. We’ve lived in the same Kingdom for so many cycles, they shouldn’t have the heart kill each other over nothing. We’re brethren!

I’ve been hearing rumors that an old childhood friend of mine is styling herself as ‘The Pirate Queen of the Vistula’, so I’m on my way to see her. And if she is I’m giving her and her little haram of boy-toy clingers-on a piece of my mind.

We’re the first generation of elves, born right after the founding of the city. There’s a lot of pride to be had there, and those idiots know better than to suddenly betray that heritage. There’s simply no excuse.